2.56pm
(Hot and humid afternoon.
Feel a headache coming on)

Chance or Choice Part II

Thanks everyone for all your opinions and thoughts. It's quite interesting reading all the mails. The opinions are definitely split between two camps: the romantics and the realists. So where do you stand?

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A female opinion:

"Love is a most annoying phenomenon that happens without rhyme or reason. And when it does, good luck to you because there is nothing to do but to hang on for the ride. Love is tempestuous and petulant. Like the hurricane that randomly chooses to destroy some and yet leave others untouched. Love is both kind and mean. It is many things but it is never stable.

Which is why the calming influence of commitment must be brought to bear. Which is why commitment, to be effective, must be utter and blind. Where love is borne by commitment, then and only then, can fidelity be born out of faith.

And fidelity, as we all know, is the cornerstone of marriage."
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A male response to the above statement:

"Back to the issue about Love being Chance or Choice, I think it is both, and both have to be present. Without Chance, or Marital / Romantic Fate, how could we possibly meet the guy or gal who strikes a chord in our hearts? I felt, and from my experience, believe this to be IMPOSSIBLE!! Next, on Choice, really, it is our choice to keep this love, or give it up. Who can stop us? Before we start to blame circumstantial elements, I think we have to ask ourselves, deep down in our hearts, how much we love him/ her that we are most willing to sacrifice ourselves, to give up our liberty, to surrender our luxuries and compromise our hitherto un-bridled lifestyles???"

Another male response:

"It is a very nice passage, very heart-warming to me. The line that I like most has to be this,
"If you decide to love a person, even with his/her faults, that's not a chance. That's a choice."
However much I may like the way it sounds and the warm feelings generated, it is still flawed.
We do really choose who we want to be with, but I wouldn't say the same of love. It is entirely of chance isn't it? I'd like to be a hopeless romantic and think that lightning does strike. But yet I'm realistic enough to understand that it can easily remain a clear sky for the rest of people's life.
And I so love this line very much,
"Even if you know there are many people out there who are more attractive, smarter, richer than your mate, and yet, you decide to love your mate just the same, that's choice."
How oxymoronic that this choice come about through chance to start off with...
And sometimes we do choose to be chanced upon (in a matter of speaking)
Haha, but I laugh at myself as I write this. Have I seen love to answer that?
Oh well, so what may be the Concierge's take on that entry?
Do you believe that it's possible to love more than one person?
And we choose who we want to love AND be with?
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For me:

We meet many people in our lives and occasionally, we will meet that special someone who will pull our heartstrings, sometimes even without our knowing. This is Chance. However, upon meeting that someone, there will come a time when we decide to be with that him/her or not. That is Choice. In this extent, I do agree with the original author.
However, the words "true love" is rather ambiguous. To me, there are 2 meanings to the words "true love".
1) Soulmate: someone whom you have instant connection with, physically, emotionally and spiritually.
2) "True" lover: someone whom you stick by, regardless of the heartaches, pains, tears. Someone whom you share your fears and joys with BUT whom might not be your soulmate
Hmmm… not too sure if the above is confusing or contradicting. A soulmate and a true lover might be the same person, but he/she might not be the same too.
So…. Do you think we choose who we want to love AND be with?

Sincerely,
Kim